Chapter 1: The Journey Begins

This narrative unfolds an adventure within the realm of online dating. Now that we’re well into the first month of the new year, it’s hard to believe that three years have passed since my last relationship. My journey commenced approximately a year and a half ago when my well-meaning friends insisted it was time for me to venture into the dating world.

“You definitely shouldn’t be left on the shelf,” they joked.

“No way, that won't happen,” I retorted, feeling a bit overwhelmed by their enthusiasm. It seemed love had taken hold of their imaginations.

Fortunately, their intentions were genuine, and they wanted to ensure I didn’t miss out on love. I eventually yielded my phone to them, allowing them to create my dating profile and set everything up.

I must admit, that day was filled with laughter and enjoyment. We were at McDonald's, having a blast as they set up my account and critiqued various profiles that flashed across the screen. To be fair, much of the initial text on my profile came from my friends who were excited to help me kickstart this new chapter. However, after about an hour, we parted ways, and I was left to navigate this new landscape alone.

Deep down, I knew I had to take this step eventually, but skepticism lingered in my mind. Sure, there were countless success stories, and many of my friends had discovered love through these apps, which motivated them to encourage me to try. Yet, I couldn't help but wonder if luck would smile upon me as well.

Only one way to find out.

My initial forays into conversations were surprisingly positive; exchanges flowed smoothly, and the guys I interacted with seemed sincere. After a few days of chatting, we arranged to meet for a meal.

Enter The Judgemental.

It was a casual Sunday lunch — nothing extravagant, as the lovely weather usually brings out the best in everyone. (If I needed to leave, it would be easy, right?)

We met outside the cafe, secured a table, and placed our orders — one pasta, one sandwich, and two drinks. So far, so good.

But then, just five minutes into our conversation, the day took a turn for the worse. It began with him critiquing my outfit — suggesting that my top could fit better, my pants were too baggy, and there was an excess of white.

“Is that your favorite color? You have too many light colors on,” he remarked, proceeding to express concern about my apparent lack of confidence. According to him, only confident women wore form-fitting clothes.

He then proceeded to comment on my makeup, recommending that I enhance my eyes with eyeliner and mascara, and brighten my look with some lipstick.

I sat there, eyes wide with disbelief, thinking, “How can anyone be so stereotypical? Who does he think he is, judging a woman he barely knows?”

At one point, I nearly wanted to shout, “Forget you!” but instead, I calmly replied, “I appreciate your feedback, but I’ll pass on your advice. Please keep it to yourself and don’t share it with another woman; you’re not in a position to judge.”

With that, I gathered my things and left.

Forget the sandwich and latte — he could have them!

And so concluded my initial encounter with The Judgemental.

However, I’m not one to give up easily after a single bad experience, so I returned to the app — swipe, swipe, swipe. Hmm, this guy seems decent; let’s give it another shot.

Enter The Forgetful.

Our conversations were lively and frequent. He responded promptly, and we exchanged messages almost daily, eventually deciding to meet for dinner.

It was a simple weeknight dinner — like two friends catching up over steaming bowls of ramen. The food was delicious, and the conversation flowed effortlessly. We even agreed to meet for a second date, which felt promising.

But that hope was mine alone.

The next day, we continued our usual chat, but halfway through, he mistakenly called me by the name Amanda.

“Hey Amanda, should we go for dinner again tomorrow night?”

I was taken aback. Who is Amanda? I certainly didn’t resemble one (nothing against Amanda, but that’s not my name).

I was annoyed. Am I being overly sensitive, or is this a valid reaction?

I replied, “Amanda who?”

He responded, “Sorry, what’s your name again? I don’t recall you telling me.”

I sent him a screenshot of our conversation where we exchanged names, and that was the last straw. I chose not to reply anymore; it felt insincere. Daily chats and a meal, yet he couldn’t remember my name?

I know he can do better.

As I fumed over The Forgetful, my notifications began to ping. Curiosity led me to check, and lo and behold, I encountered The Hyperactive.

Before I proceed, I must express my disdain for one particular habit: typing in an overly casual and inappropriate manner.

“H3ll0! I jUz sAw uR pr0fil3!! aNd I w0ULd liKE t0…..”

Really? Is this how people communicate now?

I knew exactly what I wanted to do: block him immediately.

I dubbed him “The Hyperactive” because his messages felt like they were leaping off the screen at me.

Thus, he was swiftly dismissed, leaving me with my three most memorable dating app experiences.

From the depths of my heart, I celebrate those who have found love through dating apps. I understand that success rates can be quite high, but will I abandon my search altogether? I’m still undecided.

While I may not know how or when I will meet my special someone, I remain optimistic. Love hasn’t left my heart, and I trust that when the moment is right, everything will fall into place, and he will appear.

I have faith.

? Min

Here’s a success story shared by one of my favorite writers, Amanda Laughtland, detailing her experience and triumph on Tinder. It’s both lovely and inspiring!

Tinder for the Quiet Lesbian

How I overcame my shyness and met my girlfriend

Have you read this yet?

The Lovers’ Union

Strings of fairy lights and a full moon night.

A million heartfelt thank you!

Chapter 2: Insights from the Experts

Nietzsche's perspective on forgetfulness as a positive force can offer interesting insights into our dating experiences.

This video discusses the early signs of memory loss and its implications, relevant to our understanding of forgetfulness in relationships.