Chapter 1: The Journey of Self-Reflection

Hello, I’m Keani, and I have a bit of an obsession with self-reflection. It's a love-hate relationship. This means I tend to scrutinize everything I do, say, think, feel, or sense. I often find myself rethinking situations in numerous ways to confidently conclude, “I can’t think of a better approach that wouldn’t intentionally cause distress.” At times, this leads to what I like to call analysis paralysis.

Naturally, I get triggered or realize I still have lessons to learn, which can impede my ability to rewire my thoughts effectively—because, after all, I'm human. I make mistakes repeatedly and occasionally rebel because I don’t want to be the bigger person once more. That’s completely normal.

One of the most valuable self-reflective questions I've come across is:

Am I utilizing my unique traits in a constructive or destructive manner?

In my case, did I express my compassion effectively? Did I fail to empathize with others fully, allowing my biases to cloud my understanding? Did I overlook my own self-compassion when I didn’t advocate for myself or forgive my own mistakes?

[Recognition: A heartfelt thank you to Laurie Gardner, an incredible intuitive leader and life strategy expert, for this insightful question and many others shared in her invaluable Master Classes, Trust Your Gut.]

Chapter 2: Finding Your Voice

Like many, I grew up misunderstanding how to express my voice and opinions. When faced with confrontation, I often took a passive approach, choosing silence and avoiding conflict. Essentially, I did everything possible to maintain calmness, but that didn’t always reflect how I truly felt inside.

I’ve learned to reassess moments when I thought I was okay, only to realize later that I wasn’t. Now, I’m more comfortable saying things like, “That’s not acceptable,” or “I’m not okay,” or simply “No.” And I recognize that it’s perfectly fine to express these sentiments!

Chapter 3: Embracing Challenges

Creating waves in your life allows for growth and movement. By prioritizing yourself, you establish healthy boundaries and create the space necessary to share your unique gifts with the world. When faced with obstacles or disharmony, sometimes the best solutions are to breathe and move forward.

[Recognition: Thank you, Artie Vipperla, for unlocking my true potential through your guidance in Harmonize All of You with All.]

Chapter 4: The Importance of Self-Care

The answer lies in prioritizing self-care: more joy, more learning, more compassion, and more acceptance. It’s crucial to act intentionally and intuitively. As Bozoma Saint John, CMO of Netflix and an inspiring figure, aptly stated, “Data is the solution to ease our insecurities about what we already know intuitively.”

Currently, I’m employed at Meta (formerly Facebook), where I’m learning numerous lessons. One significant takeaway is the value of being data-driven in decision-making. Admittedly, this is a challenge for me, as I’m naturally more of an empathic, go-with-the-flow individual who constantly battles imposter syndrome since joining during the pandemic.

Fortunately, I’ve felt immense support from my company and my remarkable manager, Sarah Hallahan. Bozoma’s powerful message reaffirmed my belief that I have every right to be my true self, regardless of any doubts I might have.

Video: HOW TO BREAK INVISIBLE BARRIERS | ISAAC OYEDEPO - YouTube

This video provides insights on overcoming the hidden obstacles that often hinder our personal growth. It emphasizes the importance of awareness and proactive steps to dismantle these barriers.

Video: Overcoming Invisible Barriers: Strategies for Women's Career Advancement - YouTube

In this enlightening video, strategies are discussed to help women navigate and overcome the invisible barriers in their careers, fostering advancement and growth.

Chapter 5: The Path Forward

I know I haven’t reached my full potential yet, and perfection is an unrealistic goal. I have many aspirations that I haven't yet pursued, but at 28, I feel like I’m just beginning. I’ve certainly earned my stripes from the challenges faced during my Saturn Return last year!

I want to express my pride, excitement, and gratitude. This serves as a reminder, not just for anyone reading this but primarily for myself:

Everything—good, bad, or in-between—is temporary. Keep striving to be your best self in every endeavor. Remember that even when choices seem limited, there are always options. Loving yourself is a practice that requires conscious effort. You may not excel immediately, but with time, you’ll grow stronger.

So, keep trying, and don’t forget to “fail better.” I appreciate you all.